It's Friday

I feel it all around me as I sit in my living room this morning. It is Friday. This day is filled with a myriad of emotions as we look towards the cross. We have hope, we know the end game, how the book ends and the good news…we win! But it’s Friday. There is a sense of heaviness in the air.

There is a book in the Old Testament called Ecclesiastes and chapter 3 speaks to this sense of mourning and sadness in these times:

v1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: v4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.

A time to weep and a time to mourn, I feel it. As we reflect and look on the day that Jesus was crucified I can’t help but mourn and to weep at times. Because, when we boil it all down, it was not just the eating of the forbidden fruit by Eve, the sin and subsequent finger pointing of Adam (we are still paying for that one) that led Jesus to that cross. It was also me. It was my mistakes: my anger, lust, envy, pride, jealousy and a host of other shortcomings that called for a sacrifice for sin.

-It was me, it was you, it was us.-

So today is a day of somber reflection, of remembering, and mourning as we journey to the cross, that beautiful scandalous night, and look expectantly towards Sunday.

Treading where we tiptoe

Image by Banksy



I had the opportunity and blessing to share my testimony for our youth about a month ago. I talked about my life, the sin that so easily entangles, and redeemed life that I found in Christ. It was a honor to share with our youth and hopefully to encourage them to live Christ filled lives.

In my testimony I talked about my transformed life but I also spoke on some of my struggles. I want to be honest, this is hard stuff to talk about. When I spoke with our youth I talked about my embarrassment in talking to them, I repeat that sentiment now. It is certainly not for my glory that I share my story. Rather, it is to throw cold, reality awakening water on the zombie dance of disillusionment that so many of us walk in.

I remember my first dabbling in the world of pornography. A youth leader was actually warning me to be careful because of the widespread presence of porn that was on the internet. I honestly had never thought about it but those words planted a seed that itched the back shed corners of my brain. This quickly led to an addiction that left me empty, embarrassed, and unfulfilled.

The statistics are staggering. It is estimated that 70% of 18-24 year old men visit pornography sites in a typical month. 72% of pornography viewers are men. 43% of internet users view pornographic material. Women are not left out in the statistics. 1 out of 3 viewers are female, 28% of porn viewing is from women, and 17% of women admit to struggling with a porn addiction. The pornography industry is larger than the revenues of the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix and EarthLink. Craig Gross, the founder of XXXChurch calls porn "the elephant in the pews." It is not only in the world outside of the church but it has invaded the Body as well. One of the most sad statistics that I came across in my research is that 53% of Promise Keeper men viewed pornography in the past week (when these statistics were taken).

One of the most famous kings ever, David, was obviously
browsing other things than his home page when he googled Bathsheba.

This is the reality that we are living in and it is nothing new. One of the most famous kings ever, David, was obviously browsing other things than his home page when he googled Bathsheba. Tamar surprised Judah when she became pregnant and was found to have his staff, a promise of payment for prostitution. Proverbs and Psalms are full of admonitions for God's people to stay away from lust and adultery.

Proverbs 7:25-27
Do not let your heart turn to her ways
or stray into her paths.
Many are the victims she has brought down;
her slain are a mighty throng.
Her house is a highway to the grave,
leading down to the chambers of death.

I remember the day the bomb fell. I remember trembling as a 17 year old boy when I walked into that same youth worker's home to confess my sin to her and her husband. I didn't know what was going to happen when I shared my sin. I expected disgust and being swiftly escorted from their house, a scarlet label given, and utter rejection. What I received instead was love, forgiveness, and a freedom that I hadn't felt for years. Light came into my dark places and the Light overcame. The yoke of slavery was lifted and sin had no desire to be in that place of light. That youth leader has remained one of my best friends, our bond was so close that she was my best "man" in my wedding. She and her husband have counseled me, rebuked me, battled with me, and consistently shown me Christ's love.

We have got to address this sin to our youth today. To walk beside them, share truth, and release captives to the sin that so easily entangles. This secret sin is eating away at the hearts and souls of youth and adults alike. So often it is never talked about, quietly accepted, or judged when exposed. Let's bring light and bring redemption from this sin. May all who struggle with this sin get up and get out of the sin-induced fog that clouds the mind and mindlessly leads us to the slaughter. Let's live as the redeemed and help rescue others from sin and its deceit. Be the door that opens up to a life free from this secret sin.

Awake my Soul

I am sitting in a treasure chest of history. I write this atop a monolith overlooking the grey blanketed hills at a time when history seems so important. History reminds us of who we are and where we came from.

This is a time of year that we, as people of faith, look at our history with Jesus' crucifixion and death. It is one of those squeamy times where we are uncomfortable as we celebrate what looks like a total failure to the casual observer or those who have rejected the way. To us it is the aroma of life, the sweet smell of laying down the yoke that we never could truly carry on our own. A place that is healing and a soul sighing release to those who have been set free.

I saw the Passion of the Christ, it haunted me, shook me, and left me with the unmistakable decision that I never wanted to see this movie again. It bothered me at first, why didn't I want to bask in this cinematic masterpiece that showed what Christ had done for us, the followers of the way. What spot resided in my soul that didn't allow me to enjoy and relish in a piece of our story, of our history. When it comes down to it, it is a brutal reminder of what they , no we, did to our savior. So it was odd to me as people spoke of seeing it two, three, even four times, planned on buying the movie and reveled in the stalwart film showing a piece of our faith.

It doesn't tell the whole story

I came to peace with my feelings when I realized that I didn't feel like the movie gave totality to the representation of this pivotal time of our faith. The story doesn't end there! Christ arose! He lives! We now have life through Him and have been given access to our Father through the sacrifice. Easter is about the sacrifice that was made but also that the tomb is empty!

Romans 8 lies at the crux of our reason for celebration.

34b Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?...37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

We are more than conquerors through Christs; life, death, and resurrection. We have liberation from the sting of death. "We've seen, the landfill rainbow, we've seen the junkyard of love, baby it's no place for you and me" (Over the Rhine). The quote is taken totally out of context but the sentiment remains the same. We have the free gift of grace and life through Him the Author and Perfecter of our Faith. Don't return to the garbage and wallow in the refuse that used to hold us in comfortable decay. Instead throw off all that hinders and run into the open arms of our creator who invites to life in Him.

My alarm goes off and brings me back to the grey skies and history that lies in front of me. As we seek to park the dark skies I am reminded that we hope in what is not seen, in the eager expectation of what is to come. The Ronald Reagan Library sits as a monument to a President that is now ranked highly in popularity of Presidents in history. It is good for his legacy that the story didn't end in the midst of his presidency.

Blessings from a fellow alien and stranger travelling to a better tomorrow!

Mist

Life is but a mist...here today and gone tomorrow.

I have been reminded of this and it has been keenly felt. It seems that the frailty of life is all around me, the every passing moment comes and goes and I find myself looking back in the rear view mirror flying down the highway we call life.

James 4:14 Why, you do not even know what will happen
tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears
for a little while and then vanishes.

Life is indeed a mist. I now have two acquaintances in the hospital in serious situations and a friend with cancer, all of these people my age. It is no longer the older generation or someday but it is ever present and real this week. My friend Aaron, the one with cancer, has decided to choose joy, this is a purposeful and bone grinding endeavor at times but it is a choice, and I love it. I love seeing this lived out in the way he chooses to love his wife, chooses to love the Body of Christ, and chooses to love... well, me. He is choosing joy in spite of his situation, a revolution of the heart!

I find joy in the brevity of life but I also am, at times, reminded of the sting. One of my favorite bands from back in the day had an album that dealt with that issue. I love imagery, some of you know that, it brings color into the text that sears my mind with lessons transformed into life. It is a band that most of you would hate, that is okay, don't listen. The band was One:21, pulling their name from Philippians 1:21, "for me to live is Christ and to die is gain." They are wonderful Christ followers and truly humble guys. I had the pleasure of hanging with them on several occasions and they always boldly lived their faith in humility. The chorus has bounced around my head all week,

Death, you will die, The dragon is finally laid to rest

Death is a dragon. It desires to destroy us and to take from us all that is valued on this earth. It is a beast that looms before us all, bigger than our puffed chests and fortunate circumstances, you can't beat it, you can't assuage it, and you can't pay it off...on your own. The dragon has been laid to rest, it no longer has victory over us because we have been freed from sin. Nodding to 1 Cor. 15:55, One:21 brings imagery to these sacred words.

Leaving friends is hard, those that you have labored alongside, stepping through the foothills of this template we call earth. I am also a realist....except when it comes to friends, then I become a maniacal optimist. I believe in people, I believe that when people are open and honest with each other something very special happens, we do life together. No facades, no cleverly sculpted caricatures, just life done together in honesty and humility. This, in my opinion is the zest of life, it is what I love but it has a funny side effect, it hurts when there is separation. I am not one for cliches but I find myself often steering headlong into their ease and at times, truth. Love like you have never been hurt. I hate this saying but I find truth and life in it that I wish more of us would strive for. When we love like we have never been hurt we love deeply and fully and in that comes pain in separation. In the pain of separation there is a great well of joy for we find that if it didn't hurt...it wouldn't be worth it.

So as I drink from the cup of tears I rejoice and find myself smiling in the midst of it all. It means that I am extremely blessed to feel sadness in the midst of such joy, my cup runs over amidst the sadness. Thank you for your friendship, those near and far and I find peace in another truth. The dragon has been laid to rest, my Savior sits at the right hand of God and intercedes for us so I know we will see each other again one day where there are no more tears, no more pain, only the Father...and His children.

My "non-spiritual" post....or not!

I started Running awhile back.

Anyone that knows me from back in the day...honestly, anyone that knows me now is fully secure in the fact that I am not a runner.

Something happened about a year ago. My wife, Sarah Lynn, started training for a 10k. She loved it, she had more energy, and she started encouraging me to run.

Now...like I said, I am not a runner, I dislike,, no hate, no LOATHE running. I decided to give it a try though and something miraculous happened.

I DIDN'T DIE

You may laugh, but seriously, I thought I might after the first couple of steps down the street.
I wanted to go back to the comfort of my warm house, soft couch, and Roadhouse BK Biggie big thing!

I trained and I ran the race, I loved it, I mean REALLY LOVED it.

I knew I had crested a hill in my life, I was going to run. Then something happened.

The Race was over.

No more training, no more fear of embarrassing myself whilst running, although more than one lady with a stroller passed me, super ego boost...yeah.

I stopped. quit totally gave up!

Sarah Lynn kept running, it was awesome! She is amazing and will do laps around me, I love it.

I was having a Galatians 5:7 moment...who cut in on me...I was running a good race.


So slowly, ever so gently, I started nudging myself off the couch again and putting one foot in front of the other at something other than a snail's pace...to me at least!

I love the word PERSEVERE, it is my word that gets me Amped! It makes me think of all the cool car chase scenes, Braveheart, anything that shows people overcoming things!

per·se·vere-
Continue in a course of action even in the face of difficulty or with little or no
indication of success.

and that is what Paul does that for us in the scriptures, he calls us to Persevere!

He says, in Philippians 3:12-14 "Not that I have already
obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal,
but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus
took hold of me. 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider
myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do:
Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has
called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Following Paul’s Example, forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead! YES YES YES! Strain, Push, put your shoulder too it, Move mountains, we can do it through HIM who gives us strenght!

I love Paul's writing. He has just said before that everything that he had was okay, no RUBBISH! compared to knowing Christ and being found in Him! He says all that was GARBAGE, TRASH, NOTHING, when held up to a relationship with a loving Savior, and he starts running. He presses on through trouble, hardship, beatings, reprimands, people not having faith in him, and runs with perseverance the race marked out before him.

This is a call to action for all of us.

Don't be lulled, deceived, fooled into living a mediocre life, live a life running...and running to do something more than just stay in shape.

Run in such a way as to get the Eternal Prize!

PERSEVERE

I have calmed and quieted my Soul

You ever have a song, an experience, or an object, that every time you see, smell, hear it, you are reminded of that time, you are taken immediately back to to that moment? Psalm 131 is one of those things for me. But it is the Psalm performed to music that takes me back, makes me stop, and....quiets my soul.

I was doing my daily reading today and I read Psalm 131. In our lives I think that there are things that resonate with us, that strike at our core and bring peace, hope, strength to our lives. Psalm 131 hit me right between the eyes this morning.

I had an insanely blessed time of growing while I was in College. When I went to ACU I prayed, and I prayed hard. "God, give me friends that want you more than anything else, don't let me fall into the "rut of life."" He answered... and he answered big, no HUGE. I had a tribe around me, a crew of warriors that pressed on to take hold of that which had taken hold of them...Christ seekers, followers of the WAY, Christians.

We were able to love on one another, encourage each other, and do life together in ways that I had never experienced. I think that is one of the joys of college...or it can be.

We did everything together and everyone was welcome. We had parties...HUGE PARTIES where we came together, hung out, and prayed. Nice to know that this is not an oxymoron. It was a revolution of my heart and I loved every moment.

We also played and listened to, were ministered too, lived music together.

There were a couple of bands that always spoke to us, that crept past the gates of our humanity, quietly but boldly walking into the sacred places of our heart, and set up shop to do business with us.

Waterdeep was one of those bands. They were good, no AMAZING
musicians, their songwriting struck a natural resonance with our souls. It brought us to our knees, made us stand in worship, and called us to be transformed.

So...Psalm 131. It is a simple Psalm with no pomp or revelry band, just a simple, quiet, yet powerful scripture.

1 My heart is not proud, LORD,
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things too wonderful for me.
2 But I have calmed and quieted myself,
I am like a weaned child with its mother;
like a weaned child I am content.

3 Israel, put your hope in the LORD
both now and forevermore.

The Matthew Henry Commentary says, "The psalmist aimed at nothing high or great, but to be content in every condition God allotted. The love of God reigning in the heart, will subdue self-love."

Let us trust in the Lord, let us be stilled, be quieted, and confidently trust in Him and what He puts before us. And why not... His is CREATOR, FATHER, ALPHA and OMEGA...He is our GOD.
"‘Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven." Matt. 6:9,10

I love these words, I resonate with these words, they shake the dust of the dry bones, crying out to something cryptic that lies in all of us.

Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. And when we bring what is within us out into the world, miracles happen."

So what is left? An admonition, a cry, a plea

O Israel, people of the WAY, followers of Christ, Trust in the Lord....period

and a link, a link to the song that started it all. So stop...still and quiet your soul... and Listen, and don't just listen, let Him come into that inner sanctum and speak to you.



Blessings

Who Am I?

Going through my yearly reading and I am in 1 Samuel chapter 9.

The Israelites have come through an intense season of following the Lord through the desert, finally getting into the promised land, and struggling with following God the whole way. The whole time God is with them, a cloud by day and fire by night, leading them tangibly and keeping them safe. I love this imagery but that is for another time. They are led by prophets of God, there is an order, a God's plan way that they are following as they have this new freedom.

Then something happens. They look around at others. This is probably one of their first mistakes. I know in my life when I start looking around at others, what they have, or what they do, there are times when that can get me into all kinds of trouble, because, just like all of us, I am human.

They cry out, "We want a King," just like all the other nations, Samuel tries to knock some sense into them but, then, they are sheep, and they just keep bleating for their way. God tells Samuel that he is going to give them what they want.

This is where we get to our text. It is a time of honesty and purity that I love and where Saul's thoughts are pure and in line with what God has for Him. Samuel says to him while he is looking for his donkeys, "And to whom is all the desire of Israel turned, if not to you and your whole family line?" And this is Saul's reply, his "who am I" moment, he says, "But am I not a Benjamite, from the smallest tribe of Israel, and is not my clan the least of all the clans of the tribe of Benjamin? Why do you say such a thing to me?" I know that Saul has a rough time later on and makes some serious mistakes but in this moment, in this one moment I love Saul! He basically says....who am I that I would be chosen, I am nobody, from the tribe of nobody, from a clan of nobody! It is awesome, I honestly wish more of Christendom was like this and had that same spirit, instead of chest puffing and "do you know who I am" isms, a spirit of humility and an acknowledgement of his position.

Before anyone gets to bent out of shape in the wake of my, "Thanks for being humble Saul" moment I also love his next action, he OBEYS. I know that there can tend to be two extremes in our culture today and both are hard for me. One is the attitude that has a haughty prideful spirit and the other is a ruling spirit of I can't do it. Both are hard for me. I have to say honestly I would rather have someone who isn't quite confident than someone who pridefully thinks they have it all together while they make a mess of things. Saul listens to what Samuel has to say and obeys the words that have been given to him. He doesn't wallow is self deprecation or say that he is a loser, he takes Samuel's words at face value, acknowledges who he is, and follows.

Samuel, like many of our leaders, takes the opportunity to walk alongside of Saul. It says in verse 25 of the 9th chapter of 1 Samuel that Saul and Samuel talked together on the roof of Samuel's house. Samuel took him to a solitary place, encouraged him and spoke the words that God had for him, and as we see later, walked out this plan with Saul, even when he had to speak hard, but truthful words to him.

So let us walk humbly with our God as we desire to trust and to follow Him. Let us not choose the honored seat as it speaks of in Proverbs but in honesty of spirit and humility sit in a humble place and if you are so honored, let someone call you to another place. Then obey.

MM