Who Am I?

Going through my yearly reading and I am in 1 Samuel chapter 9.

The Israelites have come through an intense season of following the Lord through the desert, finally getting into the promised land, and struggling with following God the whole way. The whole time God is with them, a cloud by day and fire by night, leading them tangibly and keeping them safe. I love this imagery but that is for another time. They are led by prophets of God, there is an order, a God's plan way that they are following as they have this new freedom.

Then something happens. They look around at others. This is probably one of their first mistakes. I know in my life when I start looking around at others, what they have, or what they do, there are times when that can get me into all kinds of trouble, because, just like all of us, I am human.

They cry out, "We want a King," just like all the other nations, Samuel tries to knock some sense into them but, then, they are sheep, and they just keep bleating for their way. God tells Samuel that he is going to give them what they want.

This is where we get to our text. It is a time of honesty and purity that I love and where Saul's thoughts are pure and in line with what God has for Him. Samuel says to him while he is looking for his donkeys, "And to whom is all the desire of Israel turned, if not to you and your whole family line?" And this is Saul's reply, his "who am I" moment, he says, "But am I not a Benjamite, from the smallest tribe of Israel, and is not my clan the least of all the clans of the tribe of Benjamin? Why do you say such a thing to me?" I know that Saul has a rough time later on and makes some serious mistakes but in this moment, in this one moment I love Saul! He basically says....who am I that I would be chosen, I am nobody, from the tribe of nobody, from a clan of nobody! It is awesome, I honestly wish more of Christendom was like this and had that same spirit, instead of chest puffing and "do you know who I am" isms, a spirit of humility and an acknowledgement of his position.

Before anyone gets to bent out of shape in the wake of my, "Thanks for being humble Saul" moment I also love his next action, he OBEYS. I know that there can tend to be two extremes in our culture today and both are hard for me. One is the attitude that has a haughty prideful spirit and the other is a ruling spirit of I can't do it. Both are hard for me. I have to say honestly I would rather have someone who isn't quite confident than someone who pridefully thinks they have it all together while they make a mess of things. Saul listens to what Samuel has to say and obeys the words that have been given to him. He doesn't wallow is self deprecation or say that he is a loser, he takes Samuel's words at face value, acknowledges who he is, and follows.

Samuel, like many of our leaders, takes the opportunity to walk alongside of Saul. It says in verse 25 of the 9th chapter of 1 Samuel that Saul and Samuel talked together on the roof of Samuel's house. Samuel took him to a solitary place, encouraged him and spoke the words that God had for him, and as we see later, walked out this plan with Saul, even when he had to speak hard, but truthful words to him.

So let us walk humbly with our God as we desire to trust and to follow Him. Let us not choose the honored seat as it speaks of in Proverbs but in honesty of spirit and humility sit in a humble place and if you are so honored, let someone call you to another place. Then obey.

MM